LITTLE THINGS MEAN A LOT

The alarm clock on my cell phone chimed, unceremoniously awakening me from my comatose-like slumber.

I turned over in the huge sleigh bed to see her lying naked beside me. Where the hell was I? Oh yeah, Southeast DC. My waking up in an unfamiliar bed was the culmination of a very successful outing the night before. She wasn't a stray I picked up or the new conquest of the moment. We had actually been seeing each other for a week or so and I'd decided to stay the night after we'd explored each other for most of the night.

But it was morning and I had somewhere to be. There was another date that was about to begin.

Though I wouldn't tell the sleeping big booty beauty beside me that my staying the night was a strategic move as apposed to some spontaneous desire to initiate post sex cuddling…it was. Strategic that is. My date for the day only lived a couple of miles away and she didn't drive, so rather than go back to Baltimore and then drive back to DC the next day, I decided to stay in DC for the night and pick up the shawty around noon to take her with me back to B-more. I had planned an all day date. And part of the planning included strategic gas management. Mac Mobile was a beast on the petro.

The sleeping one awakened to the sound of me washing my dick in the bathroom sink. She asked why I couldn't stay for breakfast and I told her I had something to do. Once in the car, I called my date to see if she would be ready by noon as we had planned. She informed me that she would indeed be ready and that I should come to her house.

She stayed in a modest single family home with her roommate and both of their children. When I got there she had already sent little junior onto the baby sitter's for the day. I instructed her to make sure she brought a bathing suit and a change of clothes. She was excited about the unknown of the surprises that lie ahead. I was excited about the opportunity to see her in a bathing suit.

She was a 25-year-old high yella semi-thick girl with light brown hair. She had a nice rack and a lil junk in the trunk. Cute probably best describes her. For the record, I normally don't do high yella girls, but she would suffice for the day. We hopped in the ride and blast back up north I-95 to Baltimore. Along the way we talked about the possibility of what the day would bring. This wasn't our first date (the first took place at Appleby's over drinks), but it would be the first time she would be seeing my place.

Back at my apartment, we changed into our swimwear and hit the pool at my development. It was a beautifully warm and sunny day and there weren't too many kids at the pool. We swam, played, wrestled and touched most of the time we were in the pool together. This went on until we tired ourselves out and worked up an appetite. We then both agreed that it was indeed time to eat.

Back in the apartment, I remained forever the gentlemen. Even though she was nude and taking a shower in my bathroom, I didn't make a move on her. After she finished, I took my shower; we both got dressed and then went to go get something to eat. I took her to a local Soul food restaurant in my neighborhood called Simone's. Over lunch we chatted about the date thus far and the thing that bought us together in the first place - Black Planet. Lol

Serial Dater: Yeah Internet dating can be some funny stuff. Not all hook ups online go according to plan. Case in point….a female friend of mine, the one who first introduced me to BP, just had a funny Internet hook up story.

High Yella Girl: Get out of here. You gotta tell me about it.

Serial Dater: You right, I have to tell you about it. It's the funniest shit I ever heard.

High Yella Girl: What happed!

Serial Dater: My friend Nina had met this guy online that she found to be very attractive. She told me he was a nice guy. A divorcee, an engineer, home owner, several vehicles and had a lil loot in his pocket. He was very sweet to her and attentive. Took her out to nice places and showered her with his time and sometimes gifts. I think he said he lived in Laurel, well anyway, one night they went out on a date and had a great time. My friend Nina decided that she was going to give him “some” that night when the date concluded. They'd been seeing each other for a while and the time was right. So back at his place they got into making out pretty hot and heavy and then it was time for sex. Well Nina tells me that when he pulled out his dick, she almost fainted from the disappointment. She said it was the littlest dick she had ever seen with her own eyes. The rubber could barely stay on. She said they tried to have sex but no matter what he tried, no matter what position she couldn't feel him inside her. And ain't but so much eating pussy you can do she said. After awhile of her time being wasted she got dressed and left. She said he kept apologizing and promised to make it up to her. She told me it was a waste of a good-looking brotha. She said she never called him again and began ignoring his calls. She couldn't wait to tell me this horror story. Isn't that the funniest shit you ever heard?

Now while I found this story to be most hilarious, my date looked on at me blankly without the least hint of joviality in her demeanor.

High Yella Girl: The story would be funny if it weren't true. (my eyes widened in anticipation of the meaning behind her statement)

Serial Dater: What do you mean, if it weren't true?

High Yella Girl: I don't know your friend, but I do know the guy she's talking about. I've dated him too and what she told you about him is true {serious look on her face}.

Serial Dater: Get the fuck outta here. You met him on BP too?

High Yella Girl: No I didn't meet him online. But I did meet him at a club in DC. And everything she said is true. He is very nice, attractive and attentive. He does know how to show a woman a good time. And yes I wanted to give him some too after one of our dates. And yes the same thing happened. I thought it was a fluke, so I gave him one more chance another time and the exact same thing happened. And I decided to not pursue anything further.

Hearing this revelation, I didn't know whether to be amazed or amused. I was putting my money on amused. That shit was even funnier after hearing another woman cosign the story. After awhile she loosened up and even had a laugh about the absurdity of the story and how small the world was.

I have to say, I feel for the brotha's who are “lackin' in the packin”. I'll refer to them as the DL Brothas (Dick Lite). ;o) They are pretty much screwed in life because of their (how do I say it) shortcomings. With this example alone, you can see how quickly the word gets out. Nina told me (a dude) along with her other friends and high yella told all her girls, who in turn probably told their girls. Next thing you know this story is getting passed around faster than a blunt at the Reggae Sunsplash festival. Poor lil dick nigga. lol

After lunch, I took her to Crofton Go-kart Raceways to participate in some, throw back to your youth, closed course racing and fun. Crofton Raceways had always been the shit when I was back in college. And I don't care how old you are, you always have fun racing in a go-kart. She, on the other hand, was tryna look cute in her short-sleeved blouse, jeans and heels. But oh well, I told her to come prepared.

Despite the inappropriate attire, she still had a great time. After six or so laps, we were ready to go. We went up the street to get something to eat and some drinks. With Crofton being pretty much halfway to her house, I was preparing to end the date and take her home. She told me about a house party that she and her roommate was throwing that night and she invited me to stay for the party. My evening was already open, so I was down for that move.

By the time we made it back to her spot, people had already begun to arrive. Drinks were already in rotation and the guests were in the mixt of gettin' straight “Throwed.” I was like, “we right on time, who got that drank?” Some cups and bottles later I was quite nice. Actually I was a lil too nice to be driving back to Baltimore, so I inquired about staying over. If she didn't want to put me up for the night, I always had Ms. Phat Booty from the night before to call. And a brotha keeps an overnight bag in the car, so I was straight. But letting me leave was the farthest thing on her mind.

After parading me around and introducing me to all her friends, it had become late and I was ready to retire for the night. I had had my fill of drinks and dancing and was set to end my already long day. Her bedroom was down in the basement of the house so I went down stairs to crash on her bed. Although the party continued on until the wee hours of the night, she came to join me in the bed. We tried to initiate a lil nookie while the house party is jumpin' session, but I was too threw. So it would have to wait until morning.

When I woke the next morning the house was very quite, a far cry from the night before. I went to go use the bathroom and do something with my breath. When I came back and got into bed Ms. High Yella was slowly awakening. Following my lead, she went to the basement bathroom to get herself together. When she returned to the bed - it was on. Armed with some pretty decent morning wood, I initiated an early morning smash session. Concluding our morning romp, I rolled over in the bed and noticed that my cell phone was blowing up on silent. I looked to see that I had missed about a dozen messages. I listened to the first message:

“Serial, when you get this message cut on the TV and turn to MTV. You ain't gonna believe this!”

I asked ole gurl if she would be a doll and cut on the tube to MTV. That's when I learned what the commotion was all about. We both sat up in the bed and listened in awe as we learned that the R&B singer known as Aaliyah had died in a plane crash. More phones in the house began to go off as the word quickly spread through the ghetto network. I couldn't believe that yet another young black music entertainer had went back to the essence. The eerie feeling I was experiencing was very reminiscent of the deaths of Tupac and Biggie. Strange.

I got myself together and left after watching about 45 minutes of the news. When I got upstairs, I noticed that quite a few other people also slept over. There were bodies everywhere - on the couch, on the floor. Must've been some party. Hopefully everybody had a good time.

I know I did.