OFFICE POLITICS

Clintonesque. I suppose that’s how I would describe that summer. Very Clintonesque.

Never would I have guessed that one lapse in judgement, one weak moment if you would, could’ve taken me on the roller coaster ride I experienced. But it was all good.

I remember the day we met. She was untainted and vibrant or so I thought; just beginning to experience life. I was pushin’ thirty in a major way. Conventional wisdom says that I should know better. But conventional wisdom didn’t have to work so close to those killer legs.

Unable to resist, I was drawn to her the same way my alcoholic uncle was to a cut-rate liquor store. The shit was magnetic. Still, I never intended to pursue her. The two of us getting together happened on its own and I ain't mad that it did.

She was the new intern. There’s that word – intern. If not for our oversexed Commander-and-Chief, it might be easier to mention the word without getting an unsettling feeling. Intern. And to make things worse, she wasn’t just any intern either. She was the daughter of one of Baltimore City’s most prominent congressmen. Shit I voted for her dad several times. He was pro-urban transit, so that meant that he was a friend of our agency. If I’d known any better, I would’ve run the other way.

My boss, the director of the communications department, introduced us for the first time. He told me she was a sophomore at Howard University and was going to be our intern for the summer. He also let on that she was looking to gain some valuable insight that she can take back with her to college. Our eyes never met as we shook hands.

Hot Intern: Pleased to meet you (she said in her soft spoken voice)

Serial Dater: You’re right on time. We’re short a person for the summer so there’ll be plenty for you to do.

Finally, the shy girl made eye contact.

Hot Intern: I’m looking forward to my experience here and learning as much as possible.

Serial Dater: What’s your college major?

Hot Intern: Political Science, but I also like to write.

Serial Dater: By the end of your time here, you’ll be switching your major over to Public Relations.

She smiled. I cringed. She was young, impressionable, slim and sexy as all get out. But I made a pact with my dick that she was going to be off limits for a number of reasons – too many to name. I was charged with being responsible for her, which meant that not only would I have to assume a mentoring role, I’d be her immediate supervisor. I valued my leadership role and my career, so I took the responsibility seriously.

Our time working together was great. I enjoyed being a mentor. I got my first experience mentoring back when I was 21. Back then I worked with a group of high school teens from Prince Georges County in Maryland, who needed to be pushed the right way academically and just have a positive semi-peer male figure provide some guidance. One of the teens I worked with back then stood out more than most. He was a very “left-field” thinking creative young kid named Germaine Williams. Little did I know that one day that teenage kid, that I thought came from another planet, would grow up to become the fierce battle rapper known as Canibus. The world is a small place.

Working beside this girl was a daily chore. Not because she was difficult to work with, quite the contrary she was like a sponge absorbing all that she could. But rather because she was a total fuckin’ distraction with her form fitting business suits and whatnot. I used to look forward to see what she would wear to work each day. One of my favorite of her outfits was this dark suit she would wear. The skirt to the suit was just short enough to be considered provocative, but yet long enough to not be considered slutty. And the heels she wore with that outfit accentuated her calves and gave that phat ass of hers even more lift and definition. I ain’t even gonna lie, I wanted to stick a finger in it. lol

One day I was feelin’ rather randy, so I shared with her an erotic story I had written. We had gotten rather close from working with each other and so I shared the story with her. Yeah I know, I fucked up and crossed the line. But she made it seem easy to do. We actually had an intellectual conversation about the story I wrote. She was an extremely bright girl. Far more intelligent than I was at her age. I was drawn to that shit.

One day, on a Friday afternoon, I sat in my cubicle/office preparing to leave for the day and start my weekend adventures. Normally she left the office promptly at 4:30 pm everyday to catch the bus home. That afternoon, she hung around until the office emptied of everyone but us. I got nervous.

Hot Intern: So Serial what’s on your agenda for this weekend? Doing anything exciting?

Serial Dater: Probably get into sumpthin’. Maybe the movies.

Hot Intern: I wish I had something to do this weekend. All of my friends from college live out of state. And I don’t really have any friends here in Baltimore.

Serial Dater: I see.

Hot Intern: I guess I won’t be doing anything this weekend other than staying in the house.

I was internally regretting the next thing I was about to say, but I said it anyway.

Serial Dater: I’m just going to put this out there. I’m going to be going to the movies out in White Marsh. If you so happen to be there, then maybe we could end up sitting together.

She was geeked about my game of cloak and dagger and partial date offer.

Hot Intern: And if you were going to be there, what time would that be?

I took in her full lips and ebony skin as she spoke. I’ve always had a thing for the chocolate sistahs and she was co-co to the core. I gave up a time and I slide her my cell number before bouncin’. On the train ride home, I thought about what I had actual committed myself too. Instantly I felt like I had made a grave error. Never shit where you eat.

I mean I had dated women on the job before. With roughly 4,000 employees overall, it was to be expected. But this was different. This could have career ramifications. My dick had once again suckered me in. So, I decided to treat this lil scenario like a hand of no hold ‘em poker – I was all in.

I called slim chocolate to let her know that I was headed to the east side to meet her at the spot. She informed me that there was a slight twist to the plan – her mom wouldn’t come up off the car. She asked if I would pick her up and just take her with me since I had to past her place along the way. I was like fuck it; enough with this cloak and dagger shit. I drove to her front door and she met me outside. It was summer time, so she had on a nice blouse and a skirt with a short heel on. She hopped in Mac Mobile and we were on our way.

In the truck, I popped in a CD and started bumpin’ Juvenile & Drag-on’s Down Bottom joint. “That’s my shit,” she said as the bass vibrated the windows. I nodded my head in agreement. That song was the shit. It reminded me of the battle of the college bands. As we talked over the music, I peeped her reach into her coach bag to pull a bottle out. It was a half empty bottle of Puerto Rican Rum. Whoa. She offered me some, I passed on the offer and then she took a swig to the head. I was like WTF. What happened to that shy innocent girl from the office? I would learn soon enough that she was a front for this other girl that currently sat in my passenger seat.

We hit the movies and go to see The Patriot with Mel Gibson. I may have had a hot girl with me, but I really wanted to see this movie. It was opening weekend, so the theater was packed. As we watched the movie and ate popcorn, I felt this hand on my leg gently caressing it. She looked at me for approval or disapproval. I said nothing. That hand then eased its way onto my crotch as she continued to stroke. Instantaneously, I had a major chubby happening. After a few minutes of caressing she pulled back her hand and we continued to watch the movie.

After the movie, we discussed the historical aspects of the film. Sometimes I unintentionally slip into nerdom. It was late (around midnight – that dayum movie was about 3 hours long), so I drove her back home. We pulled up to her house and I parked with the engine running.

Serial Dater: Well, I guess this is good night. I had a good time tonight. You’re kinda fun.

Hot Intern: Yeah I guess this IS good night. I enjoyed your company too.

Serial Dater: Well you have a good weekend and I’ll see you in the office on Monday {awkwardness}.

Hot Intern: Yeah, I guess I’ll see you in the office on Monday.

Total silence engulfed the vehicle. And no one was moving. She wasn’t getting out and I was still sitting in the driver’s seat with the truck running.

Hot Intern: This is awkward.

Serial Dater: You think huh.

Hot Intern: This is what we’re going to do. You’re going to drive your truck down the street and park on the back parking lot of Mercy High School. It’s dark back there.

WHOA.

I was definitely respecting her gansta on a level I couldn’t even comprehend at the time. Boss Bitch in action. I didn’t say a word and just followed instructions.

Behind the school it was extremely dark. I cut off the engine but left the music on for atmosphere. She kneeled in the passenger seat, unzippened my jeans shorts, then leaned over and proceeded to engulf my dick. While this was taking place I pulled her thong to the side and began to finger her. She had some major dampness happening in her happy zone.

At first I sat upright in my seat and cradled the back of her head with my right hand, but then she asked me to recline my seat. I was in some kinda heaven in that truck.

In between slurps she made sure to give me just the right amount of eye contact. Every so often I heard her moan, which automatically made me moan. Then I couldn’t take it anymore and went to my ashtray for a condom. But as fate would have it – I had none. I asked Ms. Take Charge if she had one and she said no. She then informed me that the gas station up the street sold singles. I don’t know when this phenomenon started but I like it. A lot of the gas stations in Maryland’s urban areas sell loose cigarettes and condoms.

I peeled out of Mercy’s parking lot and drove up the street to the nearest gas station. I put the truck in park, opened the door and jumped out. But I forgot one thing. My shorts were still around my ankles. My brain was so cloudy from the baby batter; I forgot to get myself together for appearances sake. So I was like fuck it and just walked up to the window with my shorts around my ankles. She was in the car cracking up. I purchased my condom and got back in the whip. Smash Time.

While we were driving back to the creep spot, ole gurl pulls out a joint of that Park Heights illy and sparks up. I couldn’t believe Ms. Congressman’s daughter was so live. She was literally off the hook, but a nigga was straight lovin’ it. I swear, while this was going down, I was thinking to myself this is gonna make a great fuckin’ story one day. She offered me a hit. I didn’t wanna seem lame, but I was on the wagon from drugs, so I passed for a second time that night. Now that I think about it, I must seemed really square that night. The only thing I wasn’t passing on was the pussy. I think I found my vice. ;o)

Back behind the high school, we were going at in the back seat like two animalistic parolees. She was riding me and we had the fucking pathfinder bouncin’ like a bad check. I’m talkin’ time to get new struts and shocks bouncing. And then she came on top of me, which was a good thing because I could no longer hold that shit any more. I let loose with the cannon and collapsed on the seat. We sat there for what seemed like forever, just looking at each other – like where the fuck did you come from? Word to R. Kelly, 18-year old na na be straight on point.

I dropped her off afterwards and then caught up with my cousins to hang out downtown.

That Monday at work she played her position and acted like it never happened. That was until after work. As we were leaving to go home, she asked could she come over to my house for a replay. I obliged. She hit the weed spot, got tweeted, came over to my house and got buck. This went on every day for a week, which was really putting me in a bad position with my other “friends”. Somebody was taking their time.

Then one day, she called me after work and told me she wanted to do something different. She asked me to meet her down town at the office. Right away I saw what was going down. Somebody had a fantasy that they wanted to play out with the kid. We worked in a high security building, so IDs were needed to get in the building and you had to sign in to get upstairs on the elevator. This was getting tricky, because now we had to put some shit in writing in that sign in book. We hopped in the elevator and went up to the 20th floor. To get up to my office on the 24th floor, a special executive pass was needed. So I used my pass to access the executive elevators (more incrimination in process).

On the 24th floor we went over to my desk and opened up the blinds to reveal the bright lights of downtown Baltimore. From my window was a perfect view of Baltimore’s Inner Harbor. The view was spectacular. Immediately we started kissing against my desk. She asked me to sit in my chair and face the window. She got down on her knees and hit me off with a lil Lewinsky action. I lifted her up and placed her in a sitting position on my desk. She was wearing a skirt and no panties. I strapped up and inserted myself into her. That shit was too erotic as the desk began to rock. “I want it from the back,” she whispered in my ear. I took her off the desk and bent her over the desk, while I stood behind her. I was starting to get scared of getting caught, so I hurried up and bust that nut. We got ourselves together and vamoosed from the building.

Along the drive home, I could only think to myself – how in the hell did I come to be so lucky?